This morning has been a rough morning...up since 5 and most of the night (not sure what is wrong with Austin) missing my man, dealing with my two wonderful but sometimes tough boys, and just going through the motions during this Holiday Season. As always, my amazing husband knows just how to calm me down and of course he did it through music. I have posted about this group before, but their lyrics can be so touching and reassuring. NeedToBreathe has a song called "Something Beautiful", which is one of their more popular songs right now. It talks about needing this deep desire for the Lord to consume our souls, wash over us and let us be taken up in His arms, give Him all our cares, and we will feel something beautiful.
Recently I have thought about the question "is this what I imagined my life to be like?" Taking care of two kids ages 3 and 1 with another on the way? Having a husband who I desire and need so much but is so far away and in harms way? Living in a part of the country that is not at all close to family or even the close friends I have made over the years? Sounds kind of depressing and overwhelming at times...but my answer to these questions is ...an absolute YES. Without all this going on in my life, I wouldn't see the Lord work and see how beautiful and amazing He is. The timing of when I met my husband to the timings of his deployments, births, pregnancies, where friends are, etc. My family is far from us, but I have truly never felt closer to them. I have a few people that I depend on only because that is what I allow, and these people have never let me down...I love you guys! So praise God I am in this life! May not be what I had imagined, however, when I look back and try and think about what I wanted I don't think I really had a clue. Definitely wouldn't have it any other way and I am so excited for our future. I don't know where we will be in a year or what our plan will be, but I think that is the way to go for me. Just letting God do His thing and watching His beauty along the way! Thanks dear Husband for your encouragement and for always helping me up:-)