A Common Funk

What is it about this age, gender, and stage in life? It seems that I am not the only one who seems to get in a funk around this time of life. I have many close friends and acquaintances who are lacking joy in their lives. Not much gets them motivated or even happy some days. What is it about this season?

Is it the kids and the life that they can drain out of us while at the same time we are required to love and nourish them. Not only that, but we WANT to love and cherish them ALL the time, but because we are all sinners...either they choose to not do something they should (or do something they shouldn't) and/or we are frustrated, in a bad mood, or just ticked off easily...we don't love on them. We then often look longinly at our children (or our spouse) while they are sleeping and am enthralled by their wonderfulness and then regret the words said earlier, the lack of time spent with them, or something else done or not done.

We are also leaving our "young years"...many of us have had one or more kids and our bodies are just NOT EVER going to be the same. No matter if we get to that high school weight again...it is just different. And I am not talking about that extra pooch...but the wrinkles, lack of time to do hair, dry skin, leaking when coughing...and I may be talking about myself here...but lack of fashion!!!

Am I just rambling here? Am I alone in this?

Another huge factor that weighs on myself for the common funk that comes in and out of my life is not being close to the Lord like I USED to be. Now...I know that God has empathy and understanding towards moms of young kids, but honestly it sucks!!! I have these moments of just craving and desiring time with God, reading His Word, and worshiping him. But then I go to do it, AND don't even get me started on what distracts me. I feel like even if I make that time for God; (which I TRY!) that because this is a different season in life and I can't serve in the church like before, and marriage is strained, and friendships are strained...that my relationship with God just won't be the same. Ugghhh...I don't even know if I am getting across what I want to say!

What I do want to say, is that we need to stop comparing ourselves to others on FB, instagram, blogs, pinterest, etc...what happened to that good old neighbor relationships??? What it boils down to is seeing what others have and wanting that. Wanting that amazing relationship with your kids and having them obey you when in reality you don't live in their house and see what goes on! Plus we need to focus on the kids that God gave US! No one mom is right in her ways...we are all given different gifts and we can glean from each other but we have to stop comparing and coveting. Same goes for our bodies, our marriages, the way our house is decorated, what kind of clothes we have, etc. It is time to be grateful, to choose to be joyful and content. I needed this pep talk so you all are getting it too:-) Getting time in with God is THE most important thing and based on that, will the rest of life fall. When we trust in him, our lives will reflect the amazing and wonderful God that is truly in charge. From yesterdays Jesus Calling "Accept yourself and your circumstances just as they are, remembering what I am sovereign over everything."

One of those moments...

Lately I have had one of those moments during a certain moment that makes you bust out laughing...if you can follow my tired brain. (by the way, I apologize for my writing...I am not eloquent, savvy, or an expert in expressing my words or telling stories. I am horrible at grammar, and they way I write comes out different than what I think in my head...there you have been warned)

Here is one of two example of "one of those moments". You all pretty much know what my hubby does and that he travels frequently. Yes, I have gotten used to it as much as I can, but there are nights when I do have a hard time with it. Where I feel like an over emotional teenage girlfriend who has to be away from her "true love" boyfriend for a God-awful week. Well, recently I was laying in the arms of my handsome hubby, trying to fall asleep, thinking about having to be alone once again. I was trying to create a memory by tracing his face (yes, sorry if too sappy) so I could remember every nook and cranny. When out of the blue the arm that is around me has a crazy muscle/or sleep twitch and SLAMS against the wall right above my head. Now...this has happened before, and this night I was lucky because I didn't get punched in the face or squeezed around the neck like other times. I just chalk it up to what happens right before he falls asleep...right?!?! Anyways, the laughter comes when I am laying there reminiscing wonderful things and I hear some sound coming from Mike...some whale-like horn sound..rruuuuhhhhhhh! That is when I had one of those moments while trying to have a sentimental moment. I busted out laughing sooo hard! Oh how I tried to have sweet and loving moment only to be interrupted by simple life:-) Guess it was time to just roll over and go to sleep.

Another hilarious moment during a more serious one:

Did you guys hear about that noravirus going around? That awful stomach bug epidemic? Yeah...well our boys had it. Everett had it first and then followed by Logan. It was definitely a hard one to see them go through because it started with about 5 hours of straight throwing up followed by being stuck on the toilet for 24 hrs. Logan started his bout at 4 in the morning this past weekend. I decided to just stay in his room because he was throwing up every 10-20 minutes. On about his 5th time, there isn't anything coming up and he is just dry heaving and burping. I was tyring to so hard to say the right things to help him through this, encourage him so he feels better, and just love on him. Oh the poor boy! I was helping hold the bowl and he just kept burping and burping! Now, if you know Logan, you know what a rule follower he is...you tell him to do something as a rule or law and he will do it no matter what. I think he was taken back at how much he was burping and he looked up at me with the most confused eyes and sorry eyes and says "excuse me mom" between burps...oh my son!!!! Had to use his manners despite the throwing up! I tried to not laugh because he continued to throw up, but it was too funny:-)

I think I have come to realize with all the kids and the years of marriage, that those moments that are sentimental, serious, or frustrating and then when funny things happen that can be the best thing for the situation. I love that God has a sense of humor and keeps things real.

New Name, New Journey!

I have decided to give my blog a new name...even though the wonderful and cute design is gone...bummer... I still want and try to "Live for His Legacy" in every day life. Jesus is the one I look towards when going through day to day situations, and I hope to follow in his footprints as best I can. Even if He has to help carry me through, I strive to live for Jesus.

The new name, "Every Day Stories" will still include posts about what God is doing for the family and myself.  I just feel like documenting my every day-life stories. As the months and years have gone on, I have some pretty interesting, humerous, and sad stories that I want to share. They aren't extriodanary, crazy, or powerful...they are just plain life experiences from my lifetime! "Every Day Stories" will hopefully give some people more insight into what goes on in my head. I have so many commonalities with you friends and family, but there are some things in my life that are different than you and those truly direct certain decisions and emotions of mine. Please stay tuned for new posts about being a wife of 9 years to a man who risks his life as a calling from God; about starting the journey into "middle age" years (yikes!!!...30!!!); about raising three boys and being resonsible for 3 families some day; and about my constant struggle to draw near yet overwhelming love for the Lord.

1,2,3...A,B,C

Of course I HAD to post about school starting, especially since my one and only Logan will be starting the school life tomorrow. I can't believe that it is that time already, and yes, as cliche as everyone has sounded, time has gone by WAY too fast. So what about it right???? Some people may be jumping and up and down excited to rid their homes of arguing, complaining, over active 5 year olds. Or some people may be crying themselves to sleep tonight wishing their baby, still needs their crust off their sandwich, please build a ship for me kid would be staying home and under their wing for another year.

I know, I am exaggerating, but seriously...what a momentous night and day tomorrow is! I have been thinking about what to say to Logan to help make tomorrow special. Something to remember, something for him to know that I love him GREATLY and will miss him...BUT am so excited for him and am rooting him on:-) I am so glad that as I was saying good night to him tonight in his own room that the right words came to me. I told him a story about being pregnant with a baby and being so excited for the baby to come...and how I knew that 5 years later he would have to go to kindergarten. Yadda, yaddaa yadaa...so much more was said and then he grabbed me around the neck and started to choke back tears! I couldn't believe it! I hoped I hadn't ruined his excitment and now made him scared for school!!! But then he said "Momma, I just miss you so much". I promised him that I would be waiting for him when he got off the bus and he couldn't believe it. What a little man...

I wouldn't say I am either of those moms that I described in the beginning, but somewhat in between with a sway to each side every now and then. My fears about Logan going to school are:

him being afraid. The teacher not loving or caring for him...being patient with his little quirks that make him Logan. Him not being able to button his pants or not being able to put on his backpack in time. Logan is a stickler for things being the right way...very ODC and I pray that he will be able to overcome the need scheduled things and find a love for flexibility. Shining all the way through it.

another fear is that I haven't taught him enough. Taught him what it means to be a child of God. Taught him what it means to not tease others, to love and accept others. To be patient and kind to ALL kids. What if he is swayed by the other students to disobey and not listen to the teacher??? I am not there to see him and correct him. In Jesus name...

I am excited however, to see the little boy he will become. I will pray daily that he will be a witness to others in the school. Even his teacher. It is a main reason why we have decided to not home school. We feel it could cripple a boys ability to be a leader and a disciple for Christ. Yes...even at this age they learn to lead and to be confident in their beliefs. I mean...Logan has asked about the Trinity and could explain it to you! How awesome is that! My work will never be done and I could have always done better...but that is why our children are gifts to us for a time being. That they are truly God's and will be used for His purpose. I will rest in that thought tonight:-)

Until tomorrow...when I will have to wake Logan at 630 to catch his 715 bus! YIKES! NIGHT!

Distraction

Ok...lets admit it. Us Stay at Home Moms get distracted. Seriously. Even though being a full time mom is crazy busy...whether it is one, 3 or 5 kids, it is BuuuuSY! But, we do get distracted by the computer, crafts or the cute kids we raise. Here is my account:

The boys took a bath...i decided to clean the bathroom while they did. I got quite a few splashes of water on me since I wasn't paying 100% attention to them, but I do have one-clean-boy's-bathroom. Then  I decided after they went to bed I would clean MY bathroom...5 minutes and DONE. Well, why not get the downstairs bathroom done...5 minutes and CLEAN! Now I feel quilty. What tooke me probably a total of 15 minutes was delayed over this past week because I didn't think I had the TIME! HA!

So...how does distraction work? Well...here it goes: decided to clean the bathroom 3 days ago. I go into the bathroom and remember I actually have to pee. Sit down to pee. "knock, knock knock" goes my cute 17 month old. I crack the door open and play peek a boo while sitting on the toilet. I get up and realize I need a tampon (sorry for the personal information). I tell the babe I am sorry but I have to go upstairs. I walk past the washer on the way to my room and I change loads. I then hear screaming down stairs and I run down because it sounds like a kid is dying. Older kid has been punched in the stomach by the younger kid. "ok...you are fine.." insert correct discipline here which takes about 20 min. I then am thirsty and get a drink which then causes all three kids to want a snack. " get a bowel and I will get the snack"...as youngest child walks by I smell something bad. Chase him down while singing ABC's so he doesn't cry so I can change his poopy bum. "mom...I want my snack!!!" Oh yes...get back to that. Please don't sit there because you will spill your snack!! Get a towel and realize there are no clean ones so I head back upstairs to find one in the laundry. Find it and come back down to find all the pillows off the couch and two little ones playing hide and seek behind them while their little legs stick out and giggles are even more obvious than those legs. I run and sneak up on them and cause about a 30 min wrestle and giggle session. Then it is lunch time...take about an hour out of the time frame and come back to finishing dishes:


Ok...seriously. Bathroom??? Really? a little boy is going to pee on the seat in about 10 min...who cares?!?!?!

POST TITLE

Dare I say that I am back to blogging? How long has it been? 5-6 months? Seems like eternity huh...especially looking back at pictures. I have to say that much as changed since then, but there is still so much of the same things going on.

Still in the same house, same city, same job, same love (and more) for my hubby and kids. Perhaps I have made a jump into a new mom-roll. Maybe I am a bit more calm, more organized, and more ready for life's road blocks...but.....probably not:-) No perfection here, no clean house, laundry still in the washer (not drying), still have an extra 10 lbs around my belly and probably isn't going anywhere no matter how many miles I run a week. I have a new perception on being a military wife after 10 years and sorry hubby...I am not afriad to share it. Being a mom isn't easy, especailly of three boys...and no, you don't understand even if you have one boy. Talk to me after a few years of being a "single" mom of three active and lively boys. I am not judging you, I am just saying we are different and thank God we are, because I would AND want to hear so much about your life and then I REALLY (serioulsy want to) would be daydreaming about it:-)

I couldn't live without my family and friends and it is hard to admit that, but it is 100% true. Just seeing you those 5 minutes at the resturaunt after 10 years of speaking made my year:-) You love my boys like I have loved them the past 6 years...how could you and why??? Thank you Lord that you do...


I am not the friend that I used to be...I don't respond immediately to my emails...sometimes it take me days or even a week. I can't believe that I have a nursing degree some days and other days I wonder why I am not using it. I appreciate the music in my life, the sunshine and also despise the clouds. This blog has become my journal. My vague yet deep journal. Be interested or not, but be warmed that you are getting a glimpse of a woman who adores Jesus, is madly in love with her husband who is always gone training, who wanted a daughter but wouldn't trade her THREE sons for the WORLD, and still doesn't know her own purpose (except to serve the one and Holy God).

Thoughts of a Spring Evening

(warning...blurry pictures ahead)

We bought Everett his first swing...

 Tonight was the perfect night to try it out...

 We had perfect weather today that made me crave summer and fall at the same time. One two three push...feel the wind through his silly hair...

I gaze at my hydrangeas coming back. They were so dead and quiet all winter. I pray I wake as they did. 

I glance down at the sight of shoes on the wrong feet, but put proudly on by a three year old, and it makes me ponder. What precious moments are these. 

A giggle that only my heart knows. How I love your smile dear Everett. 

I longingly stare at the sunset, wishing I had more a  view. For every color is created by God for God and for us. I see my surroundings in my view also, just amazed at what I have been blessed with. A fence for my house and a swing set for my children.

Could anything be any sweeter than this Spring's night?

Austin found it. He felt the wind in his hair and opened his mouth to feel it too. 

Dare I even say how big my little man has gotten? One week and he will be five. What a glorious 5 years this has been.

Six hands, 30 toes, 3 faces, and my heart that is complete. Thank you Lord for this sweet night:-)

So tired of sickness

Can this winter be over yet? Or was there even a winter? Seriously, up to 70 today and 50 tomorrow, no wonder my family (and myself) are sick all the time! Just to name a few: random high fevers for Austin and diarrhea, cough and congestion for Logan...seems constant, Mike has been feeling like he is on the edge of a healthy breakdown for a while, drinking Airborne every day, I had pneumonia two weeks ago, OUCH, and poor Everett seems to get it the worst. We were "sick free" for about 5 days and now Everett has another ear infection and croup. It came on so suddenly it frustrates me! I put him to bed last night totally healthy, going for a follow up app today and he woke in the middle of the night with the worst croup he has had yet. And yes, he has had this about 4 or 5 times. I had to sleep in his room because I was so concerned about his breathing and every time I didn't hear him breathing I woke up (his breathing was so noisy). Like I said we already had an appointment today for a follow-up for his last ear infection with ear drum burst. I went in with the hopes of getting some steriods for his throat and going home. But nooooo, another ear infection and they gave us steriods for his throat, but it didn't work. My girlfriend has recommended some home remedies for both, so we are trying that out as well.

Seriously, this is so draining! I just want a healthy family so I don't have to overstock in kleenex and tylenol, or run out and buy a humidfier just in case the vaporizer isn't working. Anyways, I need to see the good in all this...thankful for doctors that are available and for being able to get care when I need it. There...I am thankful:-) I am just praying that Everett isn't an ear tube kind of guy.

Like I said, Everett was fine last night, and I have pictures and video to show of it. Usually when mike isn't home during the evenings (which has been 4 out of 5 nights lately) we have a dance party after dinner because I am procrastinating with the dishes:-) Everett found his "cheesey" face for the camera and every time I went to take his picture, he would make this face:

He looks so much like Logan in this picture:

Austin was doing a few dance moves:

Then I scolded Everett for getting in the TV cabinet and he shot me this face...no noise behind it, just a whiny face:

Wanted to share these few...I was practicing with my new backdrop...love my boys

Hanging up the towel...or should I say keyboard?

Lots of different thoughts have been going on in my head lately and one of them is stopping the good old blog.  A week ago yesterday I went into the ER with pneumonia. One of the craziest, painful, body aching sickensses that I have ever experienced. I was laid up all day Sat and Sunday. That was very hard for me and I really missed my family (they all stayed away). Lots of things happened because of this. I almost had to stop nursing. I had gotten some antibiotics that weren't compatible with it in the ER and at that moment I just wanted something in my body to make it start to heal. After feeling somewhat better on Sunday and seeing that Everett was having a hard time with the cold turkey, no more nursing, I broke down crying and drove to my Dr's office on Sunday night to get some new meds. I guess that realization was that I have been very blessed to have nursed Everett and wanted to savor and enjoy the last month of my baby.
Second thing I realized was how powerful a gentle spirit was. Monday came around and Mike couldn't stay home to help out, so I sent him off with a smile that was only lip-deep. I wasn't sure how the day would go. My mind wanted to get the day started, but I was shocked at how weak my body was and I couldn't move very fast and my head was foggy. Because of this I knew that I would get nothing done that day besides feeding the kids and some dishes. Kinda wish that was all I had to do during these days...yea right:-) I was so amazed though at how much patience I had! The boys had their regular fighting and some how I was able to be so calm, gentle and patient; explaining the consequences biblically and encouraging them. I felt like the Holy Spirit was totally using me that day. *on a side note, I had to miss the second half of a very much needed and anticipated women's retreat on sat from the sickness...not very happy about that* As the week went on, I felt better and better each day. With me feeling better each day...my attitude got worse and I started to yell again at the boys. I often thought back to that Monday, remembering how well the boys responded to my gentle spirit and even how different Everett was. Just a more calm baby and boys who listened and obeyed better. That realization is that when I am distracted and/or not focusing on the priorities of the day...like having a gentle spirit...my whole family suffers.

Therefore, I am not sure I will be keeping up the blog. I know family would like pics and updates, so I may keep it just for that, but I appreciate those who read and follow these random posts. I have no need to boast or brag about my house, my boys, my marriage, or hobbies. I enjoy "writing" things down and sharing projects...but I know I need to be focused in this season of life. My husband, my boys, my job (household) and my faithful and loving God need my focus:-) Love you all

My heart in a song...

There's a little flame inside us all
Some shine bright
Some shine small
The rains will come
And the waters rise
But don't you ever lose your light

In this life you will know
Love and pain
Joy and sorrow
So when it hurts
When times get hard
Don't forget who's child you are

This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine
I'm Gonna let it shine
Gonna let it shine

May you live each day
With no regret
Make the most of every chance you get
Let your eyes get wide
When you look at the stars
With the same sense of wonder as a child's heart

With the ones you love
Treasure the time
And for those who are gone
Keep the memories alive

Hold on to your dreams
Don't ever let go
There's a fire inside you
Burning with hope

This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
Gonna let it shine

There will be days when you wanna give up
When clouds settle in
But after the rain comes the sun
Don't you ever forget
Don't forget
Don't, don't forget

One day there will be no more pain
And we will finally see Jesus' face
So until then I'm gonna try
To brave the dark
And let my little light shine

This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
Gonna let it shine

This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
This little light of mine
I'm gonna let it shine
Gonna let it shine
Oh, shine
Gonna let it shine
There's a little light inside us all



Wow...can I say that when I first heard this song, I about burst into tears with love and affection for my children? I could perhaps think about this song from God to me, but instead it just moved me in a way that expressed exactly how I feel about my boys. What a wonderful young children's song put in a way that is so powerful. Letting God's light shine...I pray and am excited for my boys for when the chance comes to let their lights shine. I am desperately trying to teach them the Gospel so that they will choose the Light. I want their lights to be strong and unable to be blown out. Dont' get me wrong, my light has wavered and flickered, but it is lite nontheless. There will be a time in their lives where they are tested, tempted and stumble, but just as this song portrays, God's light will always shine and as long as they walk in the light, there will be no darkness:-) 


I am going to try and print this out somehow so they can read it as they grow up and are reminded of their child like faith and how God's love penetrates them deeply. I love how God has given us songs to worship with and to feel his power and love from. Please listen to the song and be blessed!!!


Click on the link below for a great video


Addison Road- This Little Light Of Mine Music Video from fairtradeservices on GodTube.

My boy...my sweet little boy. He was the third boy to steal my heart and continues to melt me from head to toe. He squeezes the hardest, and loves long. He is passionate about what he wants and is so willing to help others. Many times I have heard him trying to break up fights between others. He adores Logan and is such a silly boy with him. He loves his Momma and wants to be just like Daddy. This week he turned 3 years old. This will be a fun year of seeing his personality shoot out even more, growing taller, and becoming even more independent than he is. So blessed to have this little man in my life and as one of my sons.

We decided to have a Top Chef Birthday party

Played "Pin the wooden spoon on the Chef". Blind-folding a bunch of toddlers is hilarious!!

Plates all ready for the decorated cupcakes

Balloon city!!! 

Austin was in awe of the transformation of the house

Cupcakes ready to be played with and decorated by the mini-chefs

Chef-hat cupcakes for the adults...yum yum!!

The chef hats that were created....nice culinary academy huh?

Austin was a bit overwhelmed in the beginning with all the people and the cupcakes out in the open. At least Logan was smiling well!

Austin's masterpiece:-)

Gotta have some good grub for the adults!

Mini-wraps and fruit kabobs for the kiddos

"Happy Birthday to you....Happy Birthday dear Austin!!!"

What a fun day he had! After it was all done and everyone had gone home, I asked him what was his favorite  part of the party. He seriously looked at me with no hesitation and said "All my friends". Awwweee! What a sweet man...thanks so much for those who celebrated with us!!!

Little Bits of Everett...

No I haven't forgotten about my other boys...but it is fun to record the differences in each at every age. Little Everett surely has a mind of his own...wants his own way and will scream to get it (which he doesn't most of the time). He is already learning to fend for himself. Here in this first video I was pushing him on the big-wheelie and he sure didn't like it when I stopped...oh boy!!




Like I have said, I LOVE that he is a dancing baby. I just figured that boy babies don't dance and I gave up hope. But this little dude loves it. He even got some pelvic thrust action in this video. To warn you...this was taken with my phone, and someone texted me while I was videoing it...that is why there are two farting noises.




Another dancing one. Yes it is the same song, but I try to give him the appropriate songs to rock out to.




Such a big boy at the grocery store! You can see his smile through his pacie

Ok...seriously Logan looks sooo old here! It is my baby with my baby!  And no, Everett is no where near walking right now. He has stood for 5 sec or more, but no steps.

Does any one notice his little tuft of hair on the back of his head? It is like his hair decided to grow from the crown of his head down...bad old mans hair cut...

That's it for my little 10.5month old stud:-)