Sunday, March 4, 2012

Hanging up the towel...or should I say keyboard?

Lots of different thoughts have been going on in my head lately and one of them is stopping the good old blog.  A week ago yesterday I went into the ER with pneumonia. One of the craziest, painful, body aching sickensses that I have ever experienced. I was laid up all day Sat and Sunday. That was very hard for me and I really missed my family (they all stayed away). Lots of things happened because of this. I almost had to stop nursing. I had gotten some antibiotics that weren't compatible with it in the ER and at that moment I just wanted something in my body to make it start to heal. After feeling somewhat better on Sunday and seeing that Everett was having a hard time with the cold turkey, no more nursing, I broke down crying and drove to my Dr's office on Sunday night to get some new meds. I guess that realization was that I have been very blessed to have nursed Everett and wanted to savor and enjoy the last month of my baby.
Second thing I realized was how powerful a gentle spirit was. Monday came around and Mike couldn't stay home to help out, so I sent him off with a smile that was only lip-deep. I wasn't sure how the day would go. My mind wanted to get the day started, but I was shocked at how weak my body was and I couldn't move very fast and my head was foggy. Because of this I knew that I would get nothing done that day besides feeding the kids and some dishes. Kinda wish that was all I had to do during these days...yea right:-) I was so amazed though at how much patience I had! The boys had their regular fighting and some how I was able to be so calm, gentle and patient; explaining the consequences biblically and encouraging them. I felt like the Holy Spirit was totally using me that day. *on a side note, I had to miss the second half of a very much needed and anticipated women's retreat on sat from the sickness...not very happy about that* As the week went on, I felt better and better each day. With me feeling better each attitude got worse and I started to yell again at the boys. I often thought back to that Monday, remembering how well the boys responded to my gentle spirit and even how different Everett was. Just a more calm baby and boys who listened and obeyed better. That realization is that when I am distracted and/or not focusing on the priorities of the having a gentle whole family suffers.

Therefore, I am not sure I will be keeping up the blog. I know family would like pics and updates, so I may keep it just for that, but I appreciate those who read and follow these random posts. I have no need to boast or brag about my house, my boys, my marriage, or hobbies. I enjoy "writing" things down and sharing projects...but I know I need to be focused in this season of life. My husband, my boys, my job (household) and my faithful and loving God need my focus:-) Love you all


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