Tuesday, June 22, 2010

re-evaluating...

I think I have figured out one definition of a mid-life crisis (well, mid 20's crisis). "A lack of feeling unique, lack of being extraordinary at one thing, and selfish seeking ways." Well, if this doesn't define your thoughts of a mid-20's crisis, it does mine. Therefore, I have decided to reevaluate the way I do things in life, how I think about myself and others, and my main goal/purpose. All big things/questions right? Kinda like "what is the meaning of life" questions. I do want to say that they seem deeper than they really are. At this point in life, I think many people compare against each other, try to one-up the other person, share opinions in ways that show theirs are best, and aren't trying to reach out to others selflessly. (kinda the definition of mid-20's crisis) I think we can get so wrapped up in what others think of us and trying to stick out in the crowd, that we forget who we need to really be concerned with. For me, I need to be concerned with how I measure up to Jesus, not my neighbor. Sounds so cliche right? Think about it for a minute, whose weights (standards) are going to matter in the end?

There are many ways in the world that we are able to compare ourselves to each other and most of the dangerous ones are online! Myspace, FB, twitter, blogs (and yes I am involved with a few!), etc. I mean, when we look at other's status', pictures, and updates...in the end what do you end up doing? Judging, comparing, being thankful that you aren't like that, or wishing you had what they had. So much ungratefulness for what you do have and who God created you to be! Just because your opinion on something is completely different than another persons, doesn't mean you are wrong...do what the Lord puts on your heart! Take what they do, pray about it if it concerns you, and do what God leads you to do. Ultimately the Lord knows what is best for you!

If I am alone in all this, please forgive me for passing judgement, for comparing, and for being jealous. I am in no way perfect and have awful, sinful thoughts. Please forgive me! Therefore, I am going to back off of the things that cause me to have these sinful thoughts and seek out ways that purpose and serve the Lord. Of course I could use my blog, and FB to further glorify God and I will , but as of now I need to focus on other things. I am trying to turn this mid-20's crisis into a positive thing that the Lord can use. If you have feelings like this, what can you, or are you doing to prevent it? Thanks for letting me share these personal feelings...it is better for me to vent them and be held accountable than anything else.

2 comments:

Eryn Stennes said...

Good one E! It's hard when they are thoughts because who can know your thoughts other than God. Your accontability comes from your relationship with him. This week at church a guest pastor said something about a church challenging it's members to read 30 chapters of the Bible a week! No WAY can I do that, but man am I going to try. You know that the more time you spend with him the more you desire to be like him and spend even MORE time with him. You can't help but imitate him when you spend so much time with him. In no way am I meeting my goal of doing this. Failing miserably in fact. :) But God knows my heart and my mind, and on that day, I hope to stand before him and see him smile. I think I've said this before but living for THAT day is huge for me and helps me a LOT. Martin Luther said, "There are two days on my calendar-'Today' and 'That Day.'" Love that.

Joey&Casey said...

As always thanks for sharing your heart and where you are at Elissa. I love that you are deep and that God is teaching you things about what he desires from you and how to live your life to the fullest for Him! Praise God that he is ever guiding us and that we are listening:). God bless you as you strive to be obediant. xoxo